// Bestiary
Every enemy in the TardSpire is listed below. Base stats shown here are pre-scaling — enemies get progressively tougher on deeper floors. All wild enemies can be persuaded into your party unless otherwise noted.
Floor scaling (wild enemies): The server calculates enemy stats using floorBoost = floor / 2.
HP scales as: baseHp + (floorBoost × hpScale). Higher HP Scale values mean faster HP growth.
Tanks (~12 scale) gain ~12 HP per floor level, standard enemies (~7 scale) gain ~7, and glass cannons (~5 scale) gain ~5.
Attack ranges also increase: each point is boosted by floorBoost × 2, defense by 1 per 4 floors.
Raid boss scaling: The Gay Cocksucking Vampire scales with both average party level and party member count.
Its HP is baseHp + (avgLevel × hpScale) × partyMemberCount, allowing it to remain a challenging endgame threat regardless of group size.
Attack is boosted by avgLevel / 1.5 and defense by floor(avgLevel / 2).
Wild enemies roam the dungeon and engage you on contact. Up to 6 can be present on a floor.
| Enemy | Base HP | HP Scale | Attack Range | BTC Drop | Persuadable? | Floor Appearance |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Wang Rat | 8 | 5 | 1–4 | 2 | Yes | 1–4 |
| Stupid Dog | 11 | 7 | 1–6 | 3 | Yes | 6–9 |
| Snail Sentinel | 18 | 12 | 1–5 | 4 | Yes | 11–14 |
| Mysterious Scooter | 16 | 5 | 2–8 | 5 | Yes | 16–19 |
| Keeper of the Toilet Bowl | 28 | 9 | 2–7 | 6 | Yes | 16–19 |
| Badass Flaming Skeleton | 22 | 7 | 3–9 | 5 | Yes | 21–24 |
| Fridge of Forgotten Leftovers | 32 | 11 | 2–7 | 5 | Yes | 21–24 |
| Pissed-Off Poultry | 20 | 5 | 4–11 | 4 | Yes | 26–29 |
| Krampus Elf | 18 | 6 | 3–11 | 4 | Yes | 26–29 |
| Lughead | 36 | 8 | 3–10 | 6 | Yes | 26–29 |
| Mimic | 140 | 10 | 4–12 | 100 | Yes | 31–34 |
Special enemies appear under specific conditions.
| Enemy | Base HP | HP Scale | Attack Range | BTC Drop | Persuadable? | Notes |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Gay Cocksucking Vampire | 500 | 10 | 10–15 | 500 | No | See Vampire Raid |
These are not combatants but will absolutely kill you.
| Hazard | How it hurts you |
|---|---|
| Boulding Ball |
A large boulder that appears on some floors and rolls back and forth in a hallway.
Getting hit deals approximately 1/3 of your max HP in damage (server-authoritative).
Enemies caught in its path are killed instantly. Step aside — bypass gaps are always
created in the walls adjacent to its hallway.
|
| Cracked Floor | Stepping on a slightly-cracked tile progresses it toward severe. Severely cracked tiles, or any cracked tile while overloaded, cause instant death by pit-spike. No HP check. There is no coming back from this one until respawn. |
Roaming enemies move around the dungeon each time you take a step. Key behaviors: